“WHY ARE YOU (AM I) READING (WRITING) THIS pick one AMAZING; (2) STUPID; (3) POISONOUS POEM?” a (you guessed it) poem, Saturday: 11/16/2019
Presbyterian PHIL FELL (pause) IN LOVE; he had waited all his life.
Then, he died SUDDENLY, leaving behind a beautiful wife,
Who was named GLADYS, along with their pet cat,
(With) NO CHILDREN, (pause) for he died too soon; whatDoYouThinkAboutTHAT?
The cat’s name was URSULA ANDRESS, black & white; she roamed at night.
(LATER) To get PHIL into Heaven was quite a task; he put up quite a fight,
‘Cause he was Christian, after all, and “they” sent him to an Islamic place,
Where, once “they” got him in there (pause) everyone had “GLADYS’ face.”
16 (count ’em) vestal virgins. (Yay) PHIL was more than “GLAD,”
That he had died and come to Heaven; “Heaven’s not half bad,”
Said PHIL, until “they” told him: “You don’t belong up here.”
So, “they” sent him “HOME” (withOUT the virgins), but with ONE BIGol’ TEAR,
To: GLADYS and the cat URSULA, who had given birth to a kitten,
Because SHE roamed at night and had been “bitten,”
By a feral cat named TONY RUGGIO, with whom SHE was NOT (very) smitten.
Anyway, Ursula’s kitten was ACTUALLY PHIL, renamed:
MARIAN, or “Little Mitten,”
EVEN THOUGH PHIL did NOT believe in transmigration or reincarnation,
Because (s)he had been a Presbyterian.
Still, (s)he sits in GLADYS’ lap as Little MITTEN or MARIAN.
Now, PHIL, MARIAN and/or MITTEN realized that (s)he has been blessed with This Life of Wonder,
AND SO HAVE YOU, Gentle Reader/Listener, so please do not blunder,
To THINK that you know what’s going on because YOUR PASTOR TOLD YOU SO.
Moral: “TRUE LOVE IS WONDERFUL (hey?), but what do I (bloody)know?