The Harsh Reality for Men:
“My energies as a doctoral candidate at IIT were not entirely consumed by a love of science. India ,perhaps more than any other place,gives equal play to the intensely cerebral,the sublimely spiritual and the dizzyingly sensual.
I had been carrying a torch in my heart, as had so many aspiring troubadours before me, for a girl “above my station “, a lovely bewitching girl I’d grown up with and had long wished secretly to make my own. Now ,surely —I thought —she will see past the mud floor of my birth and the mark of my caste to who I truly am: a future hero of scientific discovery. In that precipitous rush that the heart makes towards it desire,I asked her to be my wife.Her reply is etched in memory to this day .
“How could you think of such a thing”,she said,unamused. “Everyone knows you have no money, no prestige or social connections. What do you suppose my family would say?” She shook her pretty head as if to say,”You just don’t get it”,and walked away.
An older ,wiser man might have weighed this callous response in his heart and concluded that such a girl wasn’t likey to become my own version of Gandhiji’s (Mr.M.K.Gandhi of India) beloved Ba (i..e Mrs.Gandhi).
But I had no wisdom in such matters and my self-esteem suffered a devastating blow. For months, I didn’t speak to another girl.I couldn’t attribute the slight to her ignorance, only to my inferiority and with the zeal of a soldier wielding a ramrod against the palace gates,I strapped my intellect to the pursuit of fame and fortune.
AN IRONIC POSTSCRIPT OF THIS STORY is that years later ,after I had achieved a measure of success in California, A DELEGATE FROM THE SAME GIRL’S FAMILY APPROACHED ME WITH AN OFFER OF HER HAND IN MARRIAGE —now that I WAS “SUITABLE” !!!!!
In the most charmingly diplomatic manner I could summon, I demurred.By that time, I was genuinely beyond talking , I was genuinely beyond taking any satisfaction from the turnabout but the young man in me was healed of an old wound”.
(Source : CODE NAME GOD : DR.MANI BHAUMIK—-One of the pioneers of laser technology that made the corretive eye surgery LASIK possible)
True Story ~