DIARY OF A MAD MAN 🕴🕴

(60) (TODAY) A Song came to mind: “I Think I Love You” – by The Partridge Family. Another Song (too!), a (Chant) OM NAMAH SHIVAYA – done, wonderfully, by the devotees of Sri Sri Ravi Shankar (NOT the sitar player, but the guru – Well, actually, I don’t know! He MIGHT play the sitar too!!) YouTube Om Namah Shivaya: calls upon Shiva to aid in the death of the ego & in rebirth (through meditation – devotion?) Reminder: a quote from Anonymous – GO IN THE DIRECTION OF YOUR GREATEST HAPPINESS . . . IF you’ve lost your direction, maybe it’s best just to stay put (for a while). On the last page, the last few lines of Joseph Campbell’s “Flight of The Wild Gander:” “For there is, in fact, in quiet places, a great deal of deep spiritual quest & finding . . . . outside the sanctified social centers, beyond their purview & control: in small groups, here & there, and more often, more typically, by ones & two [Muffie & me] there entering the forest at those points which they themselves have chosen, where they see it to be most dark, and there is no beaten way or path. – – – What would I LIKE my life’s purpose to be? A: Helping to point Muffie in the “right” direction. Issue: Can your mind create a fantastic life for you? DAD – – to – – J – – ” . . . Glad we had this chat (About fastereft) Time: 1:11 P. M. Song selections: “You’re Just Too Good To Be True.” “(I Love You) Just The Way You Are.”

* – Om Namo Bhagavate Vasudevaya – – – Raco Mozos (?) [Deva Premah: Om Namo Bhagavate”] “You have to BE A LIGHT TO YOURSELF” ; Krishnamurti “Don’t get caught in method” what Ram DASS said Neem Karoli Baba taught him after Baba took many pills of LSD & NOTHING HAPPENED! * “It’s ALL A STAND-UP COMEDY * 🙂

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Diary of a Mad Man 🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴🕴

58. You can only understand bet-ween-ness IF you’re in it. WHAT IS AWAKENING? to SIMPLIFY! (Shaktipat) The Stopping of Looking – – – being immersed in the truth of I AM THAT . . . The ONLY AWARENESS is God awareness – – – it is ALL that’s going on. this is NOT philosophizing – self-evident – laid out – CRUSHED TO DUST BY LOVE – realizing, truly, that GOD is LOVE. The World Truly becomes poignant . . . be prepared to live with a broken, vulnerable heart – – – everything gets in and everything is you. – – – EVERYTHING’S ALWAYS BEEN THIS WAY = THAT IS AWAKENING & that is absolutely NOT awakening, because IT IS BEYOND DESCRIPTION. THOUGHTS ARE really significant, but ONLY if you give them significance. FEELINGS, on the other hand, are something else. – what? I do not know. Bi-polarity is BEING REALLY INTERESTED v. BEING REALLY NOT INTERESTED. Is polarity simply pointed awareness? Is not that being AWAKENED? Whatever is writing must not be aware or awakened!! it’s still asking questions! Interesting – Bart Marshall, self-proclaimed Awakened one, agrees with me, saying something like: the Absolute seems to be drawn to real JUICY (he calls them) Experiencing. My guess or belief was: Unmanifest Divinity gets into REALLY, REALLY INTERESTING stuff, good or bad, happy or sad, pleasant or terrible, It DOESN’T MATTER. Bart Marshall quote: The Heart of the matter is: this NOW moment contains ALL, but we do tell (stories?) & one of these stories is: X – – – for me, this X is part of my story: J D & Sheri Robin (my ex-wife) are apparently on the phone . . . dot, dot, dot . . . What (or who(m)) is THE GUIDE – ? Who or what is the Sat – Guru – is he / is she in or out? real or not real? Inner voice? Which Voice. A: Isn’t the sat-guru everything and anything You take it to be . . . or nothing but an urge? Sat-guru: Whatever keeps you on the path of (your) Heart (The topic of Bart Marshall’s Talk – YouTube TAT, less than an hour). {I think it is a wonderful video – but I DON’T recommend it – mainly, because I do not think I recommend anything anymore – except, maybe, “Follow your heart, whatever that means to you!”} The sat-guru, YOUR sat-guru is close to and/or allied with your feelings (perhaps all of them – perhaps even & maybe especially with your so-called negative ones) – maybe the sat-guru is not so much related to your thoughts, but somewhat maybe. Maybe this has to do with – Should I go with my heart or mind, with my feelings or thoughts,(?) Most of the so-called “spiritual” folks recommend (to) go predominantly with the heart, but maybe not always. Who knows? “The purpose of life IS this moment, whole & complete!” Bart Marshall. “THE PURPOSE OF LIFE IS THIS: The conscious union with our source” Douglas Harding. I heard something neat: WE ARE NOT HUMAN BEINGS; WE ARE BEING BEINGS. {or, I wonder, perhaps: Beings being!? Who knows!} https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TcztyNlFx0


Diary of a Mad Man🕴🕴🕴

. . . which then brings up the idea of this “crap” + Quantum Mechanics. IF we affect the experiment by anticipating a result from a series of stimuli, why can’t every effect be a result of our expecting that effect from the cause we are perceiving in the moment(?) Thus, the effect is brought about by our clouded minds anticipating it & would not arise IF we were IN THE MOMENT. Well, what about that? Yet what good does it do anyone, especially someone like me who NEVER seems to be in the moment. Anyway, you might be able to perform miracles IF you were in a situation where (the) Y effect generally followed X cause, but not IF The Amazing Randi was in the room, because his being there would thwart any miracle because HE would expect the causal effect & ruin the miracle, so to speak. Then, what about placebos? and The Pygmalion Effect? So, a real strong expectation then could become reality? Well, this is just weird, isn’t it? Is it of any value, even if it is true? Each card, each moment, is, in reality, for the realizer, a distinct, separate event – anything becomes possible if you have no recollection of past things, bleeding into absolute reality. RICHARD ROSE’s Top 10 suggestions for spirituality: (I can not remember where I got these from! I CERTAINLY do NOT suggest they are effective OR anything anyone should take much stock in – However, here they are!!) (10) Make a decision & go – i.e.: Make a COMMITMENT; (9) Get your house in order – clear the clutter for time & capacity; (8) Back away from UNTRUTH (L. O. L.?) = We don’t know the truth, BUT watch (out for) belief systems/religions, etc. . . . subtractive path! (7) DOUBT EVERYTHING – Accept the possibility of anything BUT DO NOT ACCEPT OR REJECT = Just leave yourself open; whatever is! (6) Stick to it – Do things that will keep the spiritual thing in the forefront (However, I AM QUITE CERTAIN – everything IS “spiritual,” IF you feel it is!!) . . (5) LOOK UNDER EVERY ROCK – Don’t prejudge – ANYTHING could hold truth “Be a fool for ‘GOD!’ ” (Compassion is NOT a path & can be a trap, but it’s still OK to be compassionate.) (4) Retraverse the RAY OF PROJECTION: i.e.: Look upon the Looker. Turn 180 degrees, so you’re NOT so absorbed with the image – Look back into The Light, you. GOD AWARENESS is the clear single eye that is projecting. (3) LIFE gives you all the KOANS you need. – i.e.: OK, THIS is what life is showing me. * Thoughts should NOT be what we use to navigate life. YOUR life IS your path = designed to get YOUR CHARACTER to truth. Don’t become slave-ish to anything. Issue: Does the Universe have our best interests at Heart? Can YOU ASSUME Grace is friendly? Is spirituality a long term path? – then THERE MAY BE ROCKY ROADS, DRAGGED OVER GLASS . . (2) MAKE YOUR LIFE A PRAYER. One-pointed-ness of intention. Say: “I only want this!” [I CERTAINLY do NOT suggest this either!!! UNLESS you want to!!!] = GRACE now can act. (1) Have BETWEEN-NESS: Neither caring or not caring – WANTING SOMETHING A LOT, but not caring if you get it; wanting something, but being willing to surrender it at THE SAME TIME. Really wanting something, but not caring if you get it! (Whew!) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mb3iPP-tHdA (Once more! THE DUST speak-eth!!)

EDITOR : Roseanne

For all those following The Diary of a Mad Man. Thank you

One writer has entered this conversation,

Noting these DIARY Pages reflect Domestic violence against MEN

THERE WERE MANY QUESTIONS that needed to be addressed

” was this person still alive today”

” if so has that person sought

  1. Legal advise pertaining to the Predators
  2. Entered any form of support ongoing.

Yes, these concerns have been forwarded to the author of those personal DIARY OF A MAD MAN.

Domestic violence against MEN

Is a hidden topic

THERE are many men living a nightmare

Journey covering up.

If you are a Man first port of call is a Doctor, who will show you a way and places that are very private, confidential information about you and others in the same predicament

Self denial of Male Abuse becomes soul destroying events that will lead to Addictions, self promotion of guilt.

This can happen to any male, regardless of Race, Religion, profession.

Seek help.

(56)  In the next moment – today is Thursday, March Something 😮😮

(56) In the next moment – today is Thursday, March something, Sam {My Dad!} walks in with a package (out of the blue – completely) from Rita Snipes 501 Nth 1st St – Alpine, TEX. – This is, to me, VERY disturbing!! VERY disturbing: (therefore) perhaps it is EXACTLY what I need – There is no good or bad . . . I still think I will wait to open (it) until I speak with YOU. “The unwanted is a most valuable time!” Bart Marshall: “I OPEN MY MOUTH & I’M LYING TO YOU.” Poem: “THE ETERNAL NOW!” Unraveling the thread of reality (What Reality?) The Eternal . . . NOW . . . I don’t know if the stories of our lives are not really . . . more truly mythologies, rather than histories & that we are more like refined (?) archetypes, rather than persons living any history. all that’s happening . . . it is? ARE we really here, NOW(?) But, There is nobody here, is there? This moment, (is) just a card CALLED NOW – now on top of an INFINITE deck of cards, all happening simultaneously – just with the top card the most apparent, recent manifestation of one eternal reality, apparent, somehow related to every other card apparently underneath . . . Endless, eternal succession – Unfathomable because how can one experience all these apparent events from all those apparent perspectives simultaneously(?)- It would, perhaps, just seem like a blur, or blackness, or whiteness, all streaming together, no sense, no purpose, all apparently related & then again having no relation at all POOF! Proof? = The near death experience, where one apparent entity reports apparently dying & having a “life review,” where all events seem to transpire in an instant, of self experiences & the experiences of “all others,” happening at once, but with a clarity of experiencing everything in some eternal moment. The Eternal . . . NOW. & WHAT ARE WE DOING, what am I writing – Spinning Our Wheels in endless effort to try to verbally clarify – the eternal condition of the absolute. an infinite number of descriptions – How many do we need, before we say, “ENOUGH!” But, then, what do we do? Well, we deal the next card – A mystery, for the future always is, isn’t it? & what if, suddenly, in the present, we really forget the PAST. If I do, will I still be asking The Beloved* to marry me? 🙂

{* The Beloved is an archetype, a SOMETHING – that we so identify with, that we feel we must be with! IF we are alone, we are LONE-ly, an apparently pitiable condition!}

S’s story of the Alzheimers husband🤗

S’s story of the Alzheimers husband always proposing to his (55)
wife, perhaps imagining he is always 30, always proposing, stuck in time – Is this not, perhaps, the allusion to always being in
THE NOW, eternally – the now is eternity. The enlightened – in the
flesh – the transcendent man – who nearly all others see as an old
person with dementia – the demented as transcendent! Christ,
gathering all things unto Himself – The Bride . . . with his
Bridegroom, who is really the unawakened, the miserable,
aging caretaker unable to participate in the eternal
proposal – Christ’s proposal of an eternal union – offering a
taste of The Tree of Life, Christ, dumping the trappings of
material existence, in the dumpster of oblivion. Tinsel
on the tree of life, still being clung to by the grieving,
aging caretakers. How many of the enlightened, Indian
sages are described as similarly child-like, simple,
forgetful to the point of not being aware of themselves or
the “realities” others are SUFFERING UNDER. The wisdom of the
foolish & the foolishness of the wise – Who’s wise &
who’s foolish – Who’s dreaming whom? He must gather
all things unto Himself – In time, the Tree of the Knowledge
of Good & Evil must be transcended & replaced with the
Tree of LIFE, but what seeming torment to arrive at
that graceful awareness.

Just find the one who’s dreaming all this and wake ’em up . . . Is
it YOU? BART MARSHALL 2011 TAT (47 min. 40 sec.) BE HAPPY –
There’s Nobody Here. Is there? = There’s All Here, Isn’t There?
Enlightenment = (when) Questions Evaporate NOT Bart Marshall TAT Q & A

*The name is CHRIST i.e.: The singular human nature, born into this world i.e.: The One, Common Human Nature i.e.: the eternal one-ness of God & human
for Bernadette (Roberts) The NAME is called or the common Jewish name is Jesus.
back to Bernadette’s WARNING i.e.: Definition of Terms

So, the song Fly Me To The Moon came up a while back;
recently, 2 more songs have come up: (1) Dream a Little Dream of Me &
(2) Que cera, Cera — (I) have suddenly realized: There IS a singer known pretty well
for singing all of these . . . . wanna guess? (it’s) Doris Day!

DIARY OF A MAD MAN 💥💥

(54) (Then I wrote you) A POEM: Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep, IF I should die, but still can “see” (AM AWARE), in love’s embrace I hope to be:

This is MY story of dying – Whether in the flesh or in the spirit, I know not, I meet my muse (that’s YOU) we embrace in loving union & I die (maybe a heart attack) – My apparent “J” awareness is transferred “into” my beloved & “the 2 become one.” The story continues . . . as my “beloved,” perhaps attending a spiritual retreat, awakens from sleep &, in group, announces that her ex-husband has just “passed away,” but is now presently with her, inhabiting her body. She announces this to the group leader, who believes she is insane and even tells her so & that she needs help. However, 1 or 2 in the group approach her after the meeting and confirm or affirm her experience, saying, perhaps, this has happened to them too or, simply, they are certain this “thing” is true as part of her story, their story &/or some mythological truth, some transcendent, cosmological consideration of The Absolute, described as best it can be. (a) Movie is remembered: BEING JOHN MALKOVICH! Perhaps, based on talking w/SR, I have had a stroke, or, better yet, died – & 3 years in the parents’ little house is my equivalent of Christ’s being 3 days & nights in Hell, or in the tomb, before His resurrection. Is that too much to hope for? CERTAINLY IT MUST BE! This is insane sounding, but it SURE FEELS LIKE AN EXCELLENT STORY! I wonder if this sexual death bed story of mine might have been part of the mythology of Kalindi & Gourasa(n)a? Off topic: “There’s a crack in everything; that’s how the Light gets in.” CAROL SWANSON DAVID SWANSON – CAROL SEIDMAN “The Best guesses are Lies!” – Terrance McKenna. Nobody knows anything . . . Control is what beliefs are all about. We are kept from experience . . . We are repressed. EMBRACE CHAOS. EMPOWER INDIVIDUAL ARCHAIC REVOLUTION: A society on the brink of social breakdown appears to be a prerequisite. DOOMED – The World is dying . . . we are viewing it as a soap opera – it is our story. WHO’S DREAMING WHOM? He must gather all things unto himself. Eph. 3:20 Phil 3:20,21 Eph. 1: 9, 10 Eph. 1:22 1 Cor. 15: 28 (21, 22, 23) Col. 1: 19-20 . . . and find yourself – i.e.: That You are The Divine TREE OF KNOWLEDGE OF GOOD & EVIL TREE OF LIFE (L.O.L.!)

“THE CONTENTED HEART,” a.k.a.: “Diary of a Madman!” page 54. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJmOe9OPmRg

Diary of a Mad Man💥💥💥

(

conclusion to page 53): . . . . . . & to BE AWARE of BEING pure awareness most of the time or, dare I say, 100% of the time . . . . now that’s something, isn’t it!

So, Babe, that is only a poem, right? It can not possibly be
anything I really believe – right? Because, if I did really believe
that, I would be mad . . . . right? THE MAD HATTER!!

Maybe RICHARD ROSE’s EXPERIENCE WAS LESS A STROKE & MORE LIKE
DEATH –

Rose’s Story: tremendous Head Pains (maybe death) – – – OBE (an Out-of-Body Experience) – – – BACK in (the) body (& things have apparently changed)

JESUS’ Story: (also myth?) Crucifixion (apparently dies) – – – in a tomb or in Hell 3 days – – – Back in (the) body (i.e.: Resurrection) – and, of course, things have apparently changed

= just 2 stories, describing basically the exact same event(s) : i.e.: AWAKENING
I.E.: BECOMNG AWARE OF YOURSELF AS PURE AWARENESS / i.e.: becoming The Paramahansa (like the guru Yogananda) According to Joseph Campbell, Hansa means: WILD GANDER; Paramahansa means SUPREME WILD GANDER – from his Book FLIGHT OF THE WILD GANDER {and the theme of that book? That you must go DEEP – ALONE – into yourself and FIND YOURSELF – i.e.: That YOU are Divine!}

Footnote:

Paramahansa Yogananda https://g.co/kgs/UhUjYp

Paramahansa Yogananda

“Diary of a Madman,” a.k.a.: “The Contented Heart,” we have decided to (quickly) present the ending to that poem (which, of course, ends on page 53).  So, we are presenting a portion of PAGE 53!  Whoopee!  Here it is:   💥💥💥💥                            

Because so many have expressed an interested in the conclusion of the un-rhymed poem “The Bodhisattva Vow,” first presented HERE, on page 52 of “Diary of a Madman,” a.k.a.: “The Contented Heart,” we have decided to (quickly) present the ending to that poem (which, of course, ends on page 53). So, we are presenting a portion of PAGE 53! Whoopee! Here it is:
{from p. 52} . . . . I AM PURE AWARENESS, at other times . . . like a few hours ago, I am just MAD and nothing makes sense! & what’s the story today? I guess- {will} I give Dad the “stuff” I have found on the dangers of white filling material(?) SUFFERING is enjoyment? – A VERY difficult teaching . . . meant just for me. SIGN POSTS!! Little clues I have left myself . . . Hansel & Gretel’s breadcrumbs . . . to find my way home from the cottage of the Evil Witch, conditional reality . . . back home to BEYOND EDEN or BEYOND WONDERLAND, the unconditional realms? {Do such realms really exist? Preposterous! Of course NOT!} I AM removed from The World . . . my discipline(?) . . . falling into “more or less” states of awareness – trying to fathom the one, pure truth: that I AM PURE CONSCIOUSNESS, pure awareness ALONE. A-lone – A Lone Star – trying to return to the Garden of Eden – trying to get past the Mighty Guardians (that) I posted at its gates, to scare me from ever entering, purposely making them as scary as possible to return to The Tree of Life, the apparent end of the “infinity” of conditional existences. – The Tree of Life? : the absolute unknown. Is it LOVE? – EROS, AGAPE? . . . Amor(e) . . . . Mi amor – Mon Cheri * The names of the 2 Mighty Warriors I posted at the gates leading to Shangri La – ? Twiddle Dee & Twiddle Dum, the Mighty Ones. I AM THE CREATOR. I AM YOUR CREATOR. I am Alice. I am Lewis Carroll. I am the story of Alice in Wonderland . I am Lewis Carroll, writing. I am writing. I AM . . . . writing. & to BE AWARE of BEING pure awareness. Therefore, most of the time or dare I say, 100% of the time . . . now that’s something, isn’t it!” [the apparent end of the poem!!] ❤ {O. M. G.}

Diary of a Madman😁💥💥

Because so many have expressed an interested in the conclusion of the un-rhymed poem “The Bodhisattva Vow,” first presented HERE, on page 52 of “Diary of a Madman,” a.k.a.: “The Contented Heart,” we have decided to (quickly) present the ending to that poem (which, of course, ends on page 53). So, we are presenting a portion of PAGE 53! Whoopee! Here it is:
{from p. 52} . . . . I AM PURE AWARENESS, at other times . . . like a few hours ago, I am just MAD and nothing makes sense! & what’s the story today? I guess- {will} I give Dad the “stuff” I have found on the dangers of white filling material(?) SUFFERING is enjoyment? – A VERY difficult teaching . . . meant just for me. SIGN POSTS!! Little clues I have left myself . . . Hansel & Gretel’s breadcrumbs . . . to find my way home from the cottage of the Evil Witch, conditional reality . . . back home to BEYOND EDEN or BEYOND WONDERLAND, the unconditional realms? {Do such realms really exist? Preposterous! Of course NOT!} I AM removed from The World . . . my discipline(?) . . . falling into “more or less” states of awareness – trying to fathom the one, pure truth: that I AM PURE CONSCIOUSNESS, pure awareness ALONE. A-lone – A Lone Star – trying to return to the Garden of Eden – trying to get past the Mighty Guardians (that) I posted at its gates, to scare me from ever entering, purposely making them as scary as possible to return to The Tree of Life, the apparent end of the “infinity” of conditional existences. – The Tree of Life? : the absolute unknown. Is it LOVE? – EROS, AGAPE? . . . Amor(e) . . . . Mi amor – Mon Cheri * The names of the 2 Mighty Warriors I posted at the gates leading to Shangri La – ? Twiddle Dee & Twiddle Dum, the Mighty Ones. I AM THE CREATOR. I AM YOUR CREATOR. I am Alice. I am Lewis Carroll. I am the story of Alice in Wonderland . I am Lewis Carroll, writing. I am writing. I AM . . . . writing. & to BE AWARE of BEING pure awareness. Therefore, most of the time or dare I say, 100% of the time . . . now that’s something, isn’t it!” [the apparent end of the poem!!] ❤ {O. M. G.}

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they need it the most” 💜💜“I’LL BE RIGHT BACK!”