Category Archives: BROKEN SOUL


Repressed memories can’t be seen, but they can still do damage.

Repressed memories are memories that have been unconsciously blocked, due to those memories being associated with a very high level of trauma or stress. Although the person repressing the memories cannot remember the events, they still have the power to impact them significantly.

The hypothesis of repressed memories is a controversial topic in the field of psychology and studies show differing results as to whether this can occur in survivors of trauma. Some psychologists believe that the memories can be recovered using processes such as hypnosis or other therapies, but there are others who state this is simply creating false memories.

So can a memory be forgotten and then remembered? And can someone be told that something happened and then remember that as true?

These questions lay at the heart of childhood trauma and abuse studies. Clinicians who work with survivors of trauma and memory researchers agree that both of the above can be true. It is an area that is very difficult to study directly, outside of a lab, as it would mean subjecting participants to some kind of trauma and then studying their memories of it. However, there are clinicians who agree that trauma experienced in childhood may lead to problems in memory storage and retrieval, and that dissociation is a likely explanation for a memory that was once forgotten and later recalled.

When an individual dissociates, the memory isn’t actually lost, but can be unavailable for retrieval for some time. Many believe that individuals dissociate in order to shelter themselves from the pain of reliving those memories. It is a difficult topic, as many researchers argue that there is very little empirical evidence to support these theories.

So instead I will share some of my experiences working in the field with survivors of unimaginable childhood abuse and trauma, as a mental health clinician. I’ve never done any research into repressed memories, but I have seen the dissociation symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder up close and personal with those I’ve worked with. When that individual stops mid-conversation, eyes suddenly glazed over, with a petrified look on their face because they are reliving a trauma with no apparent trigger for the memory.

These are individuals who for years, dealt with their pain through abusing their bodies with drugs and alcohol because the pain of what they had experienced was too much for them to bear. Some memories they could remember, and others only seemed to come out when they were in a dissociative state. I can’t quite put into words the sadness that gripped me when one young lady looked at me as though I was the abuser, because she was so “in” the memory that she was reliving it all over again. I’ve never seen pain and fear like that before or since, and that memory will stay with me personally for ever. Not long after I found myself having to hold onto in the back of a car so that she wouldn’t escape the car while my co-worker was driving.

I don’t have any of the answers, and it seems nor does anybody else. But the topic of memory, false memories, repressed memories, is an interesting one, as well as one that makes it a challenge to secure evidence in the eyes of the Court. I know I am sick of watching abusers walk the streets freely while their survivors live their lives with a life sentence, re-traumatised daily by their memories and dissociations, and tormented by the fear that other memories may be remembered later. (CE)

#Facaa #ProudFACAA #ChildhoodTrauma #RepressedMemories #FalseMemories #Psychology #Memory #Mind #Brain #Trauma #Dealing #Coping #CopingMechanism #GuardiansOfTheInnocent #VoiceForTheVoiceless #FromHellWeRise


Whether you are conscious of it or not, the fact remains that you are attracting these thoughts in your mind. You can blame your life situation, and circumstances, as much as you want but the truth still remains that it’s you that’s ultimately attracting these negative situations. No one wants to attract a negative reality, but when we are unconscious of the negative patterns in us, this is all we end up doing.

You are the magnet that attracts your reality
Look at your body as an energy field and now try to sense the content of this energy – is it positive or is it negative? Positive energy field feels like lightness, joy, peace, love and zero resistance. Negative energy field feels like depression, anger, powerlessness and despondency. Negative energies always stem from fear. The only reason there’s fear in your being is because you are disconnected from the reality of life, from the truth of life.

Negative energies attract a negative reality. For example, if you are depressed, you end up attracting more reasons and situations to feel depressed about. This seems highly unfair to the “Me” that life should be so screwed up as to give more depression to a person who is already depressed. The truth however is that law of attraction is the operating principle of creation in this universe. Consciousness creates reality by “attracting” it.

In simple terms, consciousness is an “attraction” based force. Consciousness does not “repel” anything. So if your consciousness is full of negative thoughts, you will end up attracting more negative thoughts, and eventually start attracting a highly negative reality. Even if your chronic thought is that “I don’t want cancer”, since you are focusing on cancer, and since the thought is ridden with fear, it’s a given that you will end up attracting a reality that reflects this fear back at you. The universal force does not respond to your “Words” it responds to the “Energy” behind the words.

The thoughts in your mind attract more thoughts like it
Get this – “A thought, when given attention, starts thinking more thoughts”. Each thought is a form of consciousness and it has the capacity to “attract” onto itself. So when a negative thought arises in your mind, it has the capacity to attract more negative thoughts. The fuel for a thought is “attention”. A thought cannot survive without your attention. In the absence of attention, a thought simply loses its force and dies back into the nothingness from which it arose.

If your head feels full of negative thoughts, to an extent where you feel highly overwhelmed by them, it’s simply because you have been feeding attention to these thoughts unconsciously and have ended up strengthening them tremendously. Now these negative thoughts have the capacity to attract a negative reality.

Starve the negative thoughts by removing your attention
The only way to be free of the overwhelming momentum of the negative thoughts in your mind, is to start starving them by not giving them “attention” anymore. Remember that no thought is self employed, and it needs your attention to sustain itself. If you stop giving attention to the negative thoughts when they arise, they will start losing momentum automatically and stop coming up with such a force. With time there will be huge spaces between thoughts and no thought will have any power over your being.

Thoughts are meant to be creative forces, and they can only serve this purpose when they arise from a place of love and abundance. The space of your being has the capacity to generate creative thoughts, but it’s not possible for these thoughts to become active in you unless you clear your mind of the cloud created by your “conditioned” thinking (which is always based in fear).

Initially it can feel uncomfortable to not pay attention to a thought
Initially, it can be quite unsettling to not pay attention when a negative thought arises. Each thought tries to clamor for attention because by its very nature it’s a “pulling” force or an “attraction” based force. So each thought tries to attract your attention, more so if it already has a lot of momentum going for it from your past attention. It might feel uncomfortable, and even fearful, to not pay attention to these thoughts when they arise.

In some people, a lot of panic arises, when they try to remove their attention from a negative thought. In a way you are addicted to your thinking mind, and to remove attention from it can activate withdrawal symptoms like panic, anxiety and nervousness. These feelings may become more dominant if you are trying to “force” your attention away from the mind. The secret is to not “force” the attention away from thoughts, but to ease it away. It’s all about relaxing your focus.

Relax your attention, and free your consciousness
The most natural way to move your attention away from thoughts is to simply relax your awareness. Open your focus instead of contracting it. Attention in a way is “focused” awareness. What’s really needed is that you “de-focus” your awareness, relax it, and don’t contract it on any thought. Just sit back, relax and let your awareness be free. Can you can sense that you are constantly trying control and focus your attention, instead of letting go of it? That’s a form of control that needs to be let go of so that wholeness can flower through.

It’s helpful to just sit by yourself, alone, and practice relaxing your attention away from the mind. It might be difficult to do this initially if you are in a noisy, or crowded, environment. It’s all about letting go of the addiction to your thinking mind, and coming back to wholeness where your awareness is “free” of the conditioned mind.

Effective ways out of the negativity.
1. Discover the Roots of Your Negative Thoughts and Beliefs
The first thing you now need to do is to find out where exactly your negativity is coming from. It’s not uncommon that people recognize something other than the actual root cause for their negative thinking patterns, or they just see the symptom, and treat the wrong thing.

To find out exactly what needs to be fixed in your belief system, please see our article about releasing negative beliefs – it has some effective tips and techniques you can use as a way to dig out what keeps you from being positive. For many people, just becoming aware of the thoughts that are holding them back is enough to defeat them, because the very reason that these negative beliefs have power over us is often the fact that we’re not aware of their existence; once we become aware of it, we may discover that it’s completely ridiculous, and that there’s no reason to hold on to it.

2. Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT)
EFT is a powerful technique for taking back control of your mood, thoughts and emotions, so that, instead of instinctively reacting to events or people, you can be free to use your emotional energy the way you want to, and when you want to.

EFT involves making notes of the shifts in your emotions, and after a while, when you have collected some “records“, you will be able to identify the situations when you are most susceptible to falling down emotionally, and to replace them with the positive thoughts. EFT traditionally involves tapping specific points on the body (as a form of mental acupuncture) and repeating positive affirmations. You can learn more about this technique in this article.

3. Choose to Simply Stop
This technique is very simple: when you recognize a negative thought or reaction appearing in your mind, simply choose to stop thinking and feeling it.

It’s always your choice what you will think and feel, so this is a reasonable advice; however, some people are having more trouble than others with simply choosing to stop, so we recommend that you add some visualization to this: make it a routine to imagine that your thoughts are like a river, or like TV, and when a negative ones pop up, simply put them back to the river and let them go away, or switch the TV channel to something more positive.

4. Caricaturize Them
The last technique is also very simple, although it requires some creativity on your part: if something is bothering you so much that you can’t shake it off, then make up a story that will make it even worse, but that is so unbelievable that your mind will immediately dismiss it.

For example, if you’re having a hard time because you can’t afford to buy a house, you can affirm that it’s a very difficult situation indeed, that soon you won’t have a roof over your head, no place to sleep, actually you probably don’t have enough money to buy food and bills for the next month – and so on. If you felt down about not having enough money to buy a house, then taking it this far will make your mind realize that you feeling bad about the lack of money is completely ridiculous, and that there’s actually nothing to feel bad about.

So called “rehabilitated” paedophile gymnastics coach Derek Godfrey was convicted in Australia and then the US for child exploitation material charges.

Derek Godfrey was sentenced in the US District Court in Sacramento on Thursday to eight years’ jail for child pornography charges dating back to 2006 in the Californian capital.

The 48-year-old has admitted to being a child pornography addict with “a preference” for nine to 12-year-old girls and over the years caught the attention of authorities in Australia, Europe and the US.

Godfrey claimed before his sentencing he now “has the tools to manage his addiction” after receiving treatment in US and Australian jails. We at FACAA find that statement hilarious because here he is getting released from one prison and being sent directly to another, he is not passing go he is not collecting $200 but he is collecting 97 months behind bars !

The fact is these so called “rehabilitation” programs do nothing, once they cross that line and decide that their lives will be dedicated to the destruction of children’s lives there is no going back, there is simply no fixing them once they make that decision.

Derek Godfrey appealed his original sentence served in Western Australia and was then released and thrown straight into a US prison for committing the exact same crime prior to coming to Australia.

His globe-trotting began in 2006 when US Homeland Security Investigations special agents raided his home in the Sacramento area and found 400 videos and 5,000 still images on his electronic devices depicting the sexual abuse and exploitation of minors.

He was working as a youth gymnastics coach in Sacramento, let that sink in. He was coaching children’s gymnastics with a paedophilic interest in 9 – 12 year old girls that includes bestiality and incest.

The day after the search warrant was executed on his home Godfrey fled the US for the Netherlands but he was also “ultimately involved in pornography” again. He then travelled to Australia where he worked as a gymnastics coach in Perth.

How was he allowed into Australia and then given clearances to coach children’s gymnastics with a warrant out for his arrest on child exploitation material charges ?

Western Australian Police found more than 6000 child sexual abuse images and videos, including incest and bestiality, on Godfrey’s computers when they arrested him in 2012. He was sentenced to a 4.5 year jail term that was later reduced to 3 years by a WA appeals court.

After completing the Australian sentence he was extradited to the US in 2016 to face the possession of child exploitation material charge from the 2006 raid.

Godfrey entered a guilty plea to the US count in March. The 97-month sentence he received was just short of the maximum statutory penalty of 10 years in prison.

So when he is released in almost 8 years from now, will he be allowed back into Australia to teach gymnastics again ?

Derek Godfrey is clearly a dangerous paedophile, the fact that he hasn’t been arrested and charged with abusing a child yet speaks much more to the fact that he has not yet been caught, rather than he has not yet offended, in our eyes.

Child exploitation material possession shows someone who is dangerous and should never again be allowed near children, especially not in a coaching role…..
The risk is just not worth taking!

#FACAA #ProudFACAA #DerekGodfrey #Gymnastics #GymnasticsCoach #Paedophile #ChildExploitationMaterial #NotChildPorn #PornImpliesConsent #ChildrenCanNotGiveConsent #GuardiansOfTheInnocent #VoiceForTheVoiceless #HopeForTheHopeless #ChildrensChampions #EndingChildAbuse #RaisingAwarness #ChangingLives #HealingSurvivors #CHangingLaws #Legal #Law #LegalReform #JuliasJustice #PhoenixProgram #TakeAStance #SaveTheKids #WeWilLFight #StandUP #NeverGonnaStop #FromHellWeRise

One of our sources for this post was–spt.html

Life doesn’t get easier or more forgiving, we get stronger and more resilient !

It’s the little things in life that can mean so much………….We often hear people saying that those who have endured trauma need to just ‘get over it’ and often the people saying that actually mean well, they want to see us happy and moving forward so they think we need to just think of something else. If only it was that easy. Personally, just the date today has triggered some terrible memories and emotions and that got me thinking. Thinking about how each and every trauma survivor can feel like they are doing well, only to be side swiped by a smell, a song, a taste, a place, a date and so on.

What also struck me today though was the other ‘little things’ – the friends who reach out and listen – the ones who will sit quietly in your darkness with you and simply allow you to hurt while making sure you are not hurting alone and that you are safe.

Being a survivor doesn’t mean we are always strong or that we are ‘over it’ – it means we have lived through hell and made it out the other side, battered and forever changed but still able to smile, laugh, love, cry and breathe. It’s perfectly okay to have to lean on others sometimes, to admit that we need help and accept the support that friends, family and professional services can provide us with.

What we need to remember is that we have made it this far, we can keep going – even though sometimes it will all seem to be too much to take.

If you find yourself back in those dark depths, please tell someone and ask for help, it is a hard step to take I know but it is worth it. (GE)
#fromlittlethingsbigthingsgrow #FACAA #ProudFACAA #ifyoustumblemakeitpartofthedance #survivors #survivorsunday #SaveOurChildren #StopVictimBlaming #VictimBlaming #EndingChildAbuse #RaisingAwareness #ChangingLaws #HealingSurvivors #ChangingLives #GuardiansOfTheInnocent #VoiceForTheVoiceless #HopeForTheHopeless #ChildrensChampions #WeWillFight #StandUp #NeverGonnaStop #JuliasJustice #PhoenixProgram #TakeAStance #ChildAbuse #Survivors #ChildAbuseSurvivors #SelfSabotage #SelfForgiveness #SaveTheKids #NoMoreVictimBlaming #NSW #NSWPOL #NSWPolice #MissingOffenders

Today I saw a post asking how were you belted when you were a child ? Depicting brooms belts, what ever . Supposed to be a funny post 🤐 comments were laughing funny junk. Gosh was I angry.

Never. How dare any person attack a child. You big bastards. It’s not Ok to lift your hand to your children. Go and see a Doctor get your brain checked out. That is so evil. Pick on someone your size and see if you don’t get punched. Why would you Assult a child. You would hit your own child who has to protect themselves from harm from you. God help you cause sure enough we will not help you.
Time you take responsibility for the crime you have commitment against humanity

The above loneliness definition suggests that loneliness is not the same thing as aloneness is a difference between solitude and isolation. One can be alone but not lonely. Loneliness reflects a discrepancy between the current quality of one’s social relation solitude the desired quality of one’s social relationships. If a person does not wish to improve one’s social relations, then the person may not be considered to be experiencing loneliness.

The Experience of Loneliness
What are the elements of loneliness? There are many possible feelings associated with loneliness. Mikluciner and Segal (1990) conducted some studies in which participants were asked to describe a situation in which they felt loneliness. In their first study, they had a list of 40 loneliness feelings. Some of the feelings (with the percentage of participants) included self-pity (32 percent), the feeling that there was no one who understood them (17 per cent), helplessness (24 per cent), a sense of being different (20 per cent), boredom (14 per cent), and others had rejected them (18 per cent). These loneliness research findings provide insight concerning the experience of loneliness.

Possible Causes of Loneliness
There are many possible causes of loneliness. The possible causes of loneliness may be situational (e.g., lack of social support, moving to a new location, or having a job that requires you to work many hours), personal (e.g., shyness or social skill problems), or a combination of ritual national and personal variables (being different from the people around you).

Mehrabian and Stefl (1995) found that shyness was positively correlated with loneliness. In other words, greater shyness was associated with greater loneliness. One possible explanation of this finding is that shyness causes loneliness. However, because this study was correlational, we cannot make causal conclusions. There are other possible

explanations. For example, it is possible that shyness may be correlated with other personality characteristics that cause loneliness, and there is no causal relationship between shyness and loneliness.

Stokes (1985) found that loneliness was negatively correlated with the frequency of receiving supportive behaviours. In other words, greater loneliness was associated with receiving less supportive behaviours. It is possible that the lack of social supbehavioursa cause of loneliness. However, because the finding is correlational, there are other possible explanations for the finding and a lack of social support may not have been a cause of loneliness.

Bell (1993) found that emotional loneliness was negatively correlated with the perceived similiarity of one’s interests and ideas with friends and acquaintances. In other words, people who were more lonely were more likely to feel that their ideas and interests were not shared by friends and acquaintances. Because this study was correlational, we cannot make causal conclusions. There are a number of possible explanations. For example, one explanation is that being different was a cause of loneliness. Another possible explanation is being lonely causes one to perceive that one is different.

Child Abuse

Suppression orders are meant to protect the innocent, yet all too often they end up hiding the perpetrator

Suppression Orders – those who have been following FACAA for a while will recall that we have posted about these orders before, but in light of some questions we have received and recent media coverage of the 201 “missing” NSW offenders, I thought we might just touch on them again.

Suppression orders are automatically applied to most cases of the sexual abuse of a child. This, according to the legislation, is to protect the victims. When a suppression order is in place, anyone who tells others that the offender involved has indeed been convicted of a sexual offence against a child is liable to criminal prosecution themselves, as they have breached the order.

This then of course means that although we can be told that there are 201 offenders missing in NSW, we cannot be told who most of them are or where they were last known to be. I am sure you are seeing the irony of this already……….

We can be told the names and whereabouts of those people who have killed a child, but not those who are known to rape and molest children………in order to protect the children.

Yes, I most definitely do have first hand knowledge of some people who are grateful for the suppression orders, who feel that their privacy and anonymity are protected by the orders. I have seen and heard children being bullied in schools because they are known to have been victims of sexual abuse.

This to me is a sad indictment on our society – what thinking person mocks someone for being sexually abused? Clearly the children doing the bullying in these cases are copying the words and attitudes of the adults they are in close contact with. We need to stop the victim blaming and start really protecting our children. That includes the adults who say things like “Surely the mother knew this was going on – she should be locked up” “Where were the parents while this was going on?” and so forth – the one and only person to blame for the sexual abuse of a child is the person who is abusing them.

There are people who say that if we were able to know the names of sexual predators we would have an increase in vigilante attacks – this is not what the evidence from places such as America would indicate and quite frankly I would rather risk the safety of a predator than that of a child any day. Those who would wish harm to these abusers are mostly the victims or the families of those they have preyed upon and statistics show that most of them are more interested in moving on than in any form of retribution. They want justice yes, sentences that fit the crimes, to be heard, believed and validated, but not normally to kill or injure their abuser.

I personally feel that suppression orders should not be automatic – if their sole purpose is truly to protect the victims as the legislation states, then let the victims decide if an order is to be put into place or not.

Surely, the simple fact that so many offenders are wandering around out there, flying under the radar as it were, highlights the very real need for a publicly accessible child sex offenders register. (GE)

#FACAA #ProudFACAA #SaveOurChildren #Suppression #Suppressionorders# #StopVictimBlaming #VictimBlaming #EndingChildAbuse #RaisingAwareness #ChangingLaws #HealingSurvivors #ChangingLives #GuardiansOfTheInnocent #VoiceForTheVoiceless #HopeForTheHopeless #ChildrensChampions #WeWillFight #StandUp #NeverGonnaStop #JuliasJustice #PhoenixProgram #TakeAStance #ChildAbuse #Survivors #ChildAbuseSurvivors #SelfSabotage #SelfForgiveness #SaveTheKids #NoMoreVictimBlaming #NSW #NSWPOL #NSWPolice #MissingOffenders


As I sat by the window last night

I saw a moon beam

Pherhaps you were that soul who

Who sleeps over there

Suddenly I saw a smile on your lips

I wonder if was me or some other reason you smiled in your dreams

Cause it really does not matter

Cause you will always come home to me

You love me 💙💙