“MY AMAZING MUSINGS OVER POTENTIAL SEXUAL ABUSE APPLICATIONS OF SLIDER(ING) WIDGETS, GRAZING IN MY BUREAU DRAWER, NAMELESS HERE, FOREVERMORE, HITCH!” * a poem a.k.a.: “Am I Losing My Blogging Mind?” August 26, 2018, Me Mum’s Birthday is on a Sunday this year, like today!
Widgets are AMAZING; I found a few today;
With-a-MacGuffin* – in-my-bureau-drawer,
“carrying-on”-in-an-”unnatural” way (?)
When I found them, they were squealing, squealing with delight,
And The MacGuffin? It was grinning – The scene was outta sight!!
As I watched them, oh, so carefully, they grew before my eyes;
They grew & grew & then exploded, and confetti swarmed the room!
The MacGuffin spread its “Hitchcock-ian” wings; I wondered: “Will it ZOOM?”
Slowly-it-went (at first) and then (WOW!) with a nod,
The MacGuffin just-really took-right-off; y’know, ‘twas really MOD!
In-retrospect, what-they-were-doing –
might NOT-have-been-unnatural, after all,
For I’ve really no idea, if-their-performance-was-fulfilling-Nature’s-call!
Anyway, I cleaned everything up and dusted just a bit;
IF I hadn’t done that, I was pretty sure, MOTHER-would-throw-a-fit!
AND!! As I emptied the colorful confetti – in the outside trash,
I’m sure, that-passing-by,* was Alfred Hitchcock, dressed-up in a sash!
He paused for just a moment, I think, and stared at me,
Then, continued his walk, “widgeting” with glee! 🙂
- Alfred “Hitch” Hitchcock, known as “The Master of Suspense,” was a film director who passed away about four decade ago! He was “knighted,” interviewed as THE “best” film producer/director of all times, developed the idea of a MacGuffin, which is “SOMETHING” IN A FILM THAT IS, PERHAPS, IMPORTANT, BUT YOU NEVER REALLY KNOW WHAT IT IS (!), had an apparently submissive wife Alma, who also acted as “manager,” and (Hitch) was quoted as saying: “Actors are cattle!” He died of renal failure at age 80 in 19 – (yes!) 80 and produced/directed about a zillion films, in which he sometimes made “cameo appearances,” where he just “showed up” for a few moments and that’s it! He either went to Heaven – or Hell – or some other place – or, perhaps, he is still alive somewhere, plotting his next movie.
Perhaps (although, perhaps not) it should be said that many of the female actresses “Hitch” selected for his films were blond(e)s! Some of their categories were: “The vamp, the tramp, the snitch, the witch, the slink, the double-crosser and, best of all, the demon mommy!” I am partial to the witch and the demon mommy myself, but you might have other ideas, which is fine.
HITCHCOCK PIC #1: with his wife Alma Reville and their cherub Patricia.
HITCHCOCK PIC #2: on a bus, doing a cameo appearance with one of his actors.
HITCHCOCK PIC #3: with his daughter Pat, her daughter Terry, Joe, Pat’s husband, Alma and my sister Alicia, although I have no idea how Alicia got in there, but she did get a degree in “Radio-Television-Film” ** at THE University of Texas, in a place called Austin (a POWERful place, suitable for visitation, but not more-or-less permanent habitation)! Possibly, Alicia’s studies endeared her to the Hitchcock family, and they might have adopted her, or something! Anyway, Alicia NOW lives with her husband Steve in Dallas, Texas, not far from Austin, and she is here, visiting Alpine to celebrate mum’s birthday. “AUSTIN IS WEIRD, BUT ALPINE IS FAR OUT!”
HITCHCOCK PIC #4: a sculpture of “Hitch,” near a studio in London, England.
“Families! Can’t live with ‘em; can’t live without ‘em!” The Mystic Poet.
** – abbrev. “R-T-F!” MY degree was from Sul Ross State University, here in Alpine, graduating with a degree in “WTF!” *** I graduated with honors, although nobody told me WHY!
*** – I have speculated that the degree requirements I may or may not have fulfilled are in “WIDGETS-Television-Film,” although I can only briefly recall taking a lot of courses in Political Science, Statistics, Really Abstract, Theoretical Algebra … and Music. I eventually went to Law School in Dallas (I think the place was “SMU,” although I never did know for sure what those letters stood for), and, yes, I do recall seeing law books at a library once or twice – and meeting some really pretty girls, who wanted to get married, although nobody told me WHY! I once found a MacGuffin in my dorm room; it taught me everything about the art of sexual fulfillment that I could ever hope to know – and more than I wanted to (know)! Amen.