“Diary of a Madman,” a.k.a.: “The Contented Heart!” page 10.

  1. Loving self = finding your joy . . . I’ve never really consistently implemented that process. Now, I am almost so, depressed, suicidal! Q(uestion): (Is there) Any chance to return to accomplish something (i.e.: loving self) that was seemingly impossible to do even in my youth (Maybe I am & have been doing it as a recluse) Direction = love to love self . . . (therefore) must discover self [Q: Who are you? . . . On the most fundamental level . . . I had no basic idea then (for last 60 years) . . . how can I have any idea now? with what seems to be totally inadequate means? * You just need an awareness adjustment, but you can not make the adjustment. KNOW THYSELF – Intellectually I believe fundamentally I am God . . . but, as manifest Divinity, what is truly authentic about me? What am I trul(l)y most magnetized to ? Maybe I don’t need to know and can’t really anyway. IF there is any chance for the unconscious to agree to begin energy delivery again . . . Energy delivery is a model only – unlimited energy may be the reality. Could be where energy begins & then activities are resumed. (A(nswer) #1: It’s the wrong question. Why is there need to do anything when nothing’s wrong) If the same patterns of this life are returned to (the ones that got the imaginary “tap” turned off/diminished in the first place), then the Unconscious knows that I still don’t know &/or love myself truly . . . How true on some level – Q: Is it too late to do anything now – A: Probably, but I really don’t know – Anything’s possible, BUT the path is perilous – What is the ratio of effort required to reward = the

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