“RELIGIOUS TRAINING!” 11/28/2017 Tuesday!

My Daddy is a Methodist,
Had a bunch o’ rules!
He forced me there on Sunday, to-sit-with-a-bunch-o’-“ghouls!”
{When-I-was-young} To sing old hymns, by Wesley & St. Claire,
When he knew {by gol’} I-wanted-t-play, when he KNEW I didn’t care!
‘Bout all that boring, religious stuff, ‘bout Jesus on the cross,
Forgiving (pause)
I tell ya:
“Church! A ‘loss!’“
And so, so long ago
Going to that place!
But mom & dad, they kept on going, to-save The Human Race!
And what of me? Well,-I’m-on-my own – (pause)
Don’t need people – ‘round me,
I flew-to-the-moon, REAL SOON, and dance and sing “Old Blarney!”*
I have no rules; I am my own!
I’ve no companions – “Give-a-dog-a-bone!”
I AM AN ISLAND! Whatcha think o’ that?
I’m lonely!
Wish-I-had-a cat! (pause)
Or Someone-To-hold-my-hand! {Maybe}
In Church!
I’ve burned-all-my-bridges! I’m-really-in-a-lurch!
I think I’m feelin’ ill!
I think I’ll go to bed!
And cry myself to sleep!
I wish that I was dead!


What’s this?
On the DARK side o’ The Moon?
It’s my dad!
And mom!
And there’s a potluck soon!
And there’s gonna be turkey! And gravy! And good stuff to drink!
And there’s that cute girl Mimy – who’s looking awfully “pink!”
And how did I get here? I haven’t a clue!
But, dang, there’re lots of cats and dogs and groovy things to do!
And, now, Margaret’s flirting at me, and I’d forgotten-I-can-blush!
You know, maybe (just) a couple o’ rules will not my “soul” a-crush!
My Daddy – Yea, a Methodist! But maybe not so bad,
I guess I never, ever knew – exactly what I had! fin. ❤

P. S.: [My Dad, well, he IS Methodist, but he’s a Catholic too! He has him no Italian blood – Yet (pause) a-more through & through! And, yes, he’s also Jewish and likes a gospel choir! And he’s at The Food Pantry, and, I guess, he’ll never tire! ‘Cause Dad’s at home with everybody – atheists and whores – and holds the hands of child-molesters – To Heaven they all soar! “Cause Dad’s a right and ready man, a real cool cat! My Daddy! He’s OK by me – he’s a Social Democrat! 🙂

*: ‘Tis there’s the stone that whoever kisses, He never misses to grow eloquent; ‘Tis he may clamber to a lady’s chamber,Or become a member of Parliament.“A noble spouter he’ll sure turn out, or An out and outer to be let alone; Don’t try to hinder him, or to bewilder him,For he is a pilgrim from the Blarney stone.”Francis Sylvester Mahony


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Kate Vane


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